Okay, so now I drink coffee. Like everyday. It’s starting to make me tired. And while I don’t crave alcohol of any sort, man, could I use a smoke.

I don’t want the coughing, the wheezing, the smell, or that overall shitty feeling that comes with it, but I want the idea of it. It just sounds so good. And as Iggy straight up says to Tom, it’s a great combination.

But I just keep building up strength. Trying to get back to running. I’m walking a bunch now. Which is great. Just want the docs to give me the thumbs up.

And Pam is dying to go somewhere. Anywhere. A short trip. A long trip. Anything. And she totally deserves it. And so do I. It’ll happen soon. And Arizona doesn’t count. Also, Sedona can suck my balls and is full of non-truths.

If I wanted my face covered in lies, I’d still be in porn.

– Karen

So, UCSF on Tuesday! Super excited to have a place that isn’t trying to force-ably file the divorce papers via email. Mayo won’t even call. Just ‘have a nice life!’ Via a portal email. Dicks. We are no longer on speaking terms.

Oh! And speaking of portals, I have three on my phone now!

-Beg your pardon?

-Ya! Three portals!

-Three?!

Three, Bob. So that means that when I have something wrong and want to talk to a doctor, I have three different portals to message. That’s my only real motivation is not to get sick or hurt, that and the fear of losing my life. But you know, Bob, that will only make someone workout just hard enough not to use the portal.

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UCSF, Mayo, and Kaiser. So far, the Kaiser doctors are the absolute best. I have found my tribe, and they are fantastic. Mayo was amayozing, but it’s definitely an operation. Guess it has to be. The revolving door needs to be fully operational, and can be down for maintenance like their portal is, every few fucking days.

Oh, and one last thing. If you are new to this, and found this blog first, and are confused as fuck, please see Fahey’s Journey.